Why it’s Valuable

Disillusionment grows us into our new chapters and produces our own life experience wisdom. It is a truth or experience that shakes us to our core and rearranges everything.

This is usually very uncomfortable, but can also be very liberating depending on the circumstances.   

Mourn the loss of what you thought or believed or had that no longer is. Say goodbye and say hello in the next breath.


The Main Ingredient to Honor It: TRUST

Trust that life is always working for you, whatever it looks like on the outside.

I know that’s a tough ask depending on what’s going on in your outside.

To help you believe now, even when there is no tangible evidence to support it, review your history and find an earth shattering time you are now super grateful for because of where it delivered you.

That’ll happen again.

Not today, but someday this thing will be a past reference point of encouragement and perspective.


A Soul Food Recipe to Move Through It With Trust

Get a red cabbage.

Choose one from the store that’s outside leaves are all bruised and shabby.  Notice how it looks when all you see is what’s happening on its exterior.

Now look what happens when you cut it open lengthwise and see the glorious intricacies of what’s happening inside.

Look how gorgeous it is.

Have faith that there is a gorgeousness growing in your being, even post feeling chopped off or cut open.


The Main Ingredient to Move Through It: MANAGE EXPECTATIONS

Disillusionment comes to wake us up to what really exists, so we can stop wasting our time and energy trying to ask a person or situation to be what it’s not.

When we get clear on what is real, we can make choices on how we will interact with it.

You can save yourself a ton of pain if you accept and work with what something actually is instead of demanding it be what you wish it were.

Gather facts and adjust your expectations accordingly.


A Soul Food Recipe to Move Through It While Managing Expectations

Collect the following foods: a homemade chocolate chip cookie, a store bought chocolate chip cookie, a piece of fruitcake, and a saltine cracker.

Taste them all and notice their differences and capacities.  Reflect upon how they could mirror the array of relationships and circumstances we encounter.

The ones that taste delicious and satisfying are merely a matter of opinion. Yet, you will be sorely disappointed if you bite into a saltine cracker and were expecting a homemade chocolate chip cookie.

Nothing wrong with the saltine, it’s satisfying to a point, but it’s never going to be a cookie, let alone a chocolate chip one. And if you understand this, you’ll be able to enjoy it for what it is.

You’ll also be bummed if you thought you were eating a homemade chocolate chip cookie and realize it’s actually store bought.

Fruitcake?  Just know it’s fruitcake.

It’s lovely once a year and that’s about it. Enjoy it then and let go of your homemade chocolate chip cookie expectations. You just might have a good time.